i think you are asking the wrong question. why does everything has to be photographically documented? why is someone oblige to tell what they did while "away"? i know it is your brother and you have loved to know all this but i also know that choice/privacy has to be respected. btw that video is cool!
In the case of my brother, he wasn’t in photographs because his lifestyle was in addiction and on the edges of society and not in places where people would tend to bring out cameras to document life events.
It’s a strange phenomenon, in a world where phone cameras are rife.
When he was alive there were fewer phones with cameras (90s) anyway so, even if he’d lived normally functioning lifestyle, there would be have been that same pull to photograph everything.
Oh absolutely @George. Not everything needs to be photographed at all (we certainly do way too much of that in society IMO), but the last photo is him at 16 and then 26 (before he passed away). It’s sad for family and friends to only have the memories of that 10 year time period and not the odd photo of him getting older and living life. As mentioned in another comment, his was an extremely unconventional lifestyle which led to his early passing so photography wasn’t something that figured in his world at all.
Nat, I don't think this is the wrong question or that by asking it, you are *needing* documentary proof of your brother's life during those 10 years. While I agree with George that "memories are in our hearts and minds not in pics in our cells or elsewhere," I'd also argue that pics can create a connection with someone in ways that we might not otherwise have. The photos of my sisters and parents, taken before I was born, have connected me to them in ways that only memories could not ... because, of course, I have no memories of them during those times. And those photos have helped me make a stronger connection with my brother-in-law because he did know her then. It isn't that we need photographs to know someone existed. It's that our memories might fade whereas photographs do not. Indeed, some people document their lives way too much, as if they feel they don't exist unless there is a photographic record of them. For me, though, photographs are tools I use to stimulate my spotty memory. I won't forget what my sisters looked like because I have so many photos of them, and I can see how they grew from gangly girls into beautiful women. I think I can understand why you'd want some photos of your brother during those 10 years.
Yes this exactly, Marie. I sometimes forget what he sounded like, his eyes, his mannerisms, and so on. Photographs help bring that back. I find it more difficult to remember him during the time of no photos, I wish we had just a couple to see that version of him and all the memories it would unravel. Today’s version of photography — to document everything — is too much; my thoughts are more about wishing I had a few of the moments that mattered ❤️
"a few of the moments that mattered"--exactly so. A few years ago I participated in an online writing course--one that I had tried multiple times to get accepted into, the third time was the charm. At our last session, we each posed in front of our webcams with an object that we found inspiring. A fellow writer took a screenshot of us and then emailed the photo to everyone. I have that photo on my wall. It means many things to me, but my point is that it is one photo, one moment in time, and as such it is so precious.
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i think you are asking the wrong question. why does everything has to be photographically documented? why is someone oblige to tell what they did while "away"? i know it is your brother and you have loved to know all this but i also know that choice/privacy has to be respected. btw that video is cool!
Thanks @perfectlight 🙃
💯 absolutely agree with what you’re saying.
In the case of my brother, he wasn’t in photographs because his lifestyle was in addiction and on the edges of society and not in places where people would tend to bring out cameras to document life events.
It’s a strange phenomenon, in a world where phone cameras are rife.
When he was alive there were fewer phones with cameras (90s) anyway so, even if he’d lived normally functioning lifestyle, there would be have been that same pull to photograph everything.
I guess (just to add) that looking back at his life and seeking ‘evidence’ to back up the memories has called for the question in a sense.
keep his memory alive, it's all that matters
❤️
Perhaps those photos would make you feel better, but in my view things don’t happen because they have been photographed
Oh absolutely @George. Not everything needs to be photographed at all (we certainly do way too much of that in society IMO), but the last photo is him at 16 and then 26 (before he passed away). It’s sad for family and friends to only have the memories of that 10 year time period and not the odd photo of him getting older and living life. As mentioned in another comment, his was an extremely unconventional lifestyle which led to his early passing so photography wasn’t something that figured in his world at all.
That’s the point, memories are in our hearts and minds not in pics in our cells or elsewhere. It’s sad sorry
Yep I hear you ❤️
Nat, I don't think this is the wrong question or that by asking it, you are *needing* documentary proof of your brother's life during those 10 years. While I agree with George that "memories are in our hearts and minds not in pics in our cells or elsewhere," I'd also argue that pics can create a connection with someone in ways that we might not otherwise have. The photos of my sisters and parents, taken before I was born, have connected me to them in ways that only memories could not ... because, of course, I have no memories of them during those times. And those photos have helped me make a stronger connection with my brother-in-law because he did know her then. It isn't that we need photographs to know someone existed. It's that our memories might fade whereas photographs do not. Indeed, some people document their lives way too much, as if they feel they don't exist unless there is a photographic record of them. For me, though, photographs are tools I use to stimulate my spotty memory. I won't forget what my sisters looked like because I have so many photos of them, and I can see how they grew from gangly girls into beautiful women. I think I can understand why you'd want some photos of your brother during those 10 years.
Yes this exactly, Marie. I sometimes forget what he sounded like, his eyes, his mannerisms, and so on. Photographs help bring that back. I find it more difficult to remember him during the time of no photos, I wish we had just a couple to see that version of him and all the memories it would unravel. Today’s version of photography — to document everything — is too much; my thoughts are more about wishing I had a few of the moments that mattered ❤️
"a few of the moments that mattered"--exactly so. A few years ago I participated in an online writing course--one that I had tried multiple times to get accepted into, the third time was the charm. At our last session, we each posed in front of our webcams with an object that we found inspiring. A fellow writer took a screenshot of us and then emailed the photo to everyone. I have that photo on my wall. It means many things to me, but my point is that it is one photo, one moment in time, and as such it is so precious.
Exactly right, and so lovely that you have such a wonderful memory 🙃